jetlanes's Xanga

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Sat, 26 Jan 2008 05:06:40 GMT

This is the beginning of sadness.

I'm at Elsa's now. She's in the shower(if you imagine this literally it's funny). Results were horrendous and thus the first sentence. It's my fault I admit. So I cry over spilt milk. I cry over myself. I am Spilt milk. Dad doesn't want me to enter sa. He actually bribed me. Man what is the world coming to. This is armageddon. We're living in revelation. I'm typing trash because results proved me trash.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Fri, 23 Nov 2007 14:50:59 GMT

The only solution to pollution is a peoples humane revolution. Forget the protocols. Green house effect, enhanced green house effect. We still partake& indulge.Someone tried to exclaim a few days ago after the disappointing lit "Literature.............................. is just for the literature students". She was obviously at a lost for words. I am a literature student. Literature.............................. is for certain literature students. Pure is not a good word. I have ten hearts, but void of feelings.

Old love, leave me alone

Habits are scary, intangible things. They don't burst in, they tread so we won't feel. It's more toward psychological than physical, this bondage. I like to bleed. But I detest the after effects. There are different types of pain. The coherrent, the consistent, the temporary, the permanent and the only-on-contact-will-you-feel-pain kind of pain. I've never sprained my ankle before, neither have I twisted any part of my body or had any broken bones. I know nothing about pain. We're complete strangers. That's cool, I do not wish to recognise pain anyway.

I am a bookworm; In the beginning, I was completely awake. I started to read Lake of Sorrows. Fell asleep after one page. That is so pathetic. I am so pathetic. Fret not, I am today, unusually condescending.

My sis is serioulsy................................................... one of a kind. She was pissed that I refused to give her my password& user for this particular website. I kinda forced her to create her own account. (she's one lackadaisical piece of : D ) When these unfortunate times fall, the usual plays out. Her username is now : Stupidbibi. Bibi is my nick name? Yes. She's nineteen by the way. Too old, too naive. She's an unsophisticated; ingenuous. I consider it my good fortune to have her as a sister. I lie through my teeth.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Thu, 22 Nov 2007 12:30:36 GMT

O levels were over ...................................................................................................................................quite a while ago. I've been very happy for quite a few days. Talking about this end-of-four-years-in-school examination; To overly under demanding.

My mum has a gift- irritating me. And a constant-PMS. She's slurping her green bean or whatever bean soup adjacent. Unfortunately for the unfortunate me, I can't request for her to go somewhere else because, not to forget, her PMS. Oh, she also commands me to get my notes packed& disappeared from the uh, floor/ground/tiles by Saturday(which is in 2 days time). Other than that she's fine. Perfectally fine.

I watched A very long engagement recently. It apparently is, a very long show. & I apparently was not captured by the very long movie & dosed off halfway. I didn't know it was M18 until the middle of the movie, serious. Anyway, it's not as if kids these days aren't mentally polluted. What is the media doing?

Another show I watched yesterday, it's a korean drama. This girl, let's call her EL. So, EL's dad died when she was still naive. (This is quite sad, I mean your dad died). Her mother remarried. She gained a stepfather& brother. Her stepbrother & her fell in love when she was 18 & he, 20. She wanted to leave to I forgot where because she found this love thing quite wrong. (As a matter of fact, I find it okay. They've 0% blood relationship) He ran away because she refused to admit pubilcally that she loves him or something like that. She regretted it like crap. They never saw each other again.

Two/three(memory enhanced) years later; EL was working in some hotel as a maid? You know, the one that responds to room service. Okay, so, he became some bigtime ganster chief. Oh, before they seperated, he promised to protect her forever. Yeah, he kept her promise, duh. He couldn't meet her or have any relationship with her because, after all he's a ganster, gansters can't have anyone they love - for safety reasons. After a while, he realises that he parents died two years ago (she doesn't know it yet). He doesn't want EL to receive the news. In the end, she still knew about it. It's a sooner or later thing.

Okay so, in the end, both of them got involved in a traffic accident. EL woke up quite a long while later only to realise that her brother/lover donated his heart to her & is obviously, dead.

To cut it short, EL's parents, step parent, brother and lover died before she was 22/23? So tragic. The title should be 'What do you do when everybody dies'.

This was on someone's msn personal message:
I've never had a friendster, nor will I have a facebook and there's nothing you can do about it. (Maybe that's why I have so few friends and no face)

HAHAHA I agree, WHOLEHEARTEDLY.
Virtual friends are off. This is not to be borne. Although I have a friendster which I left stagnant since forever. I can't remember the password. I created friendster because of May. (that was totally desperate) And the first and the last person I added was her. The rest self-invite.

I'm running a temperature. As usual, the always. Coherent, consecutive. Resounding. This isn't too good. You bend your head a little, man, headache. Cold inside, hot outside(that's so cool). So damn lethargic, but uh, can't sleep. The eyes, burning windows. It's great, feeling warm sometimes. Gives you the hint -you're warm blooded. I got a C for chinese. That's sad. Disappointing. I worked hard for half a year & I screwed up that one hour. Yes, hard work pays. Pays what? Self-satisfaction. &the results come, cruch them all. Is this your destination? It's not how you get there. It's where you arrive. I've no confidence in the late jan/early feb results. 0%. No confidence of getting a single digit. Even a 10, no. I am so pathetic. Then occasionally I self-intrude. I must be strong & all the bloody walls of sand. I'll anticipate the announcing of results. See how I crumble.

I apologise for the bad organisation.

Monday, August 27, 2007

Mon, 27 Aug 2007 07:54:59 GMT

I am a rock

A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don't talk of love,
Well I've heard the word before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.

Paul Simon

Sometimes you wish you'd get hurt before, so maybe you'll understand& identify with these poems. How does it feel like, being hurt deep. But then again, I won't want to know. If I don't bend& break, can we be friends? If I didn't hurt you so bad, can we still be friends? I drag because I don't want to anticipate vacuum. Perhaps memory shouldn't remind us of human. I pray you, let us forget. If we could live without emotions, how would it be? It's everyone and me. Always everyone, occasionally me. You train us academically, please train also our emotion.

I feel............................................................................................................... brainless, heartless.

I'm more loving towards others nowadays(it is so obvious). Actually, I think I've ten hearts, to be able to feel like that.

Literature definately makes one emo. I cannot help it, lit is my downfall, my tearing apart.That was break time, now I return to joyluck land. I just blogged twice in two days. This is something not to be borne (HAHA).

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Sun, 26 Aug 2007 14:44:03 GMT

You think you're so great. To me you're just some king of the jungle wannabe. Please continue criticizing& finding fault in everything. Oh, I forgot, the world revolves around you. You find the world disgusting, so it's disgust encircling you. From where did you purchase that mask? Because it freaks the hell out of me. Wait a minute, maybe you should just carry on with that masquerade. Your face is 1000 times worse. Anyway dear old love, the world isn't flat. It's just not as round as you think. If you read this, it's needless to go between the lines. This is so explicit, for your better understanding.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Tue, 31 Jul 2007 08:47:23 GMT

To my chinese results:

I pray you, tarry. Pause a day or two
Before you hazard; for, in showing wrong,
I lose my joy: therefore forbear awhile.
There's something tells me, but it is not good,
I would not score well; and you know yourself,
Fear counsels not in such a quality.
But lest you should not understand me well,--
And yet a candidate hath no tongue but thought,--
I would detain you here some month or two
Before you venture for me. I could teach you
How to show right, but I am then forsworn;
So will I never be: so may you kill me;
But if you do, you'll make me wish a sin,
That I had been forsworn. Beshrew your eyes,
They have o'er look'd me and divided me;
One half of me is yours, the other half yours,
Mine own, I would say; but if mine, then yours,
And so all yours. O, these fearful times
Put bars between the candidates and their rights!
And so, though yours, not yours. Prove it so,
Let results go to hell for it, not I.
I speak too long; but 'tis to peize the time,
To eke it and to draw it out in length,
To stay you from manifest.

Yes, shakespeare. I DO NOT WANT to retake. Chinese is my forte.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Wed, 25 Jul 2007 15:53:19 GMT

Old love, leave me alone

I cannot stand! my phone.

me: dad, if you get a chocolate phone, my phone, would you get white or black?

dad: of course black!

me: why?!

dad: uh

me: okay, you will look gay

dad: HAHA

I wanted him to say white so that he can take my phone& get me a new one, since he said his phone(which is some super new model) is so not user friendly. Anyway, after Os! I am gonna receive(&do) so many many things after Os. Patience is a virtue. School is being irritating recently. Actually more like teachers. Nanthini, Joyce&I are the UN. Appearently because "you only know how to talk. Don't know how to do your homework"-L*J go figure. School politics within only the teachers seem to be inadequate. They have to drag students in, by hook or by crook. The rat race is bad for health. 'If you can't join in the rat race, be considerate to the rats' HAHA bull.

During physics; TTY was flashing the workbook answers on the screen(sounds wrong but nvm). &I didn't complete it because I couldn't find it the past few days. Found it under my desk today, but that is not the point. I mean duh he'll walk around, so as he walked in the direction where my seat is situated,

me: shit(covers the book)

tty: you don't need to cover. I know, you know, the whole world knows haha

&I think some people laughed. If I had the book, you bet I'll complete my assignment. Physics practical is really getting on most of the people's nerves because out of ten points, only two will be the line of best fit; or the curve of best fit(if there's such a word). Sometimes my results are super off chart, so I draw the curve first& fake the results : D Anyway, jolene& I are the core. We use free hand for our curve,& the way we TRY to make it perfect or at least, seem perfect is................................... excellent.

I never knew O level stood for ordinary level until a few weeks ago. Ordinary level sounds so if-you-can't-even-score-all-distinctions-for-this-oridinary-examination-you're-so--screwed. I thought O was just some random letter they gave because B levels or Z levels sounds quite funny. A levels should be called EO level, extra-ordinary level.

Monday, July 02, 2007

Mon, 02 Jul 2007 14:14:39 GMT

C for

Centre

Cry like crap

Conversation cuts like glass

Chinese

Chemistry

Crescent (haha)

Cancan

Car

Crazy

Chanel

Cat

C for Dog!

That was just some random thought. Chinese tuition today. My tuition teacher, aka my aunt(by blood) got me to read some passages& she concluded that I have serious short term memory. I ask her the same words over&over&over again. "ji bai chi"according to her. Consistent&coherent : D My aunt was then telling me about my cousins& how they are 'earning money' in their primary school. My cousin would buy this thing called water baby from some shop. You know, those transparent unicellular organisms that must be placed in the water so that it would not 'die'. She believes that it is alive. &all her primary 5 naiive classmates would go "oh my god, that is so cool. Can you buy one for me please. Because my mama doesn't allow me to go out" &she'll buy &sell it to them at 50 cents when it's original price is 10 cents. profit of 40 cents per water baby. Kids nowadays develop shrewd entrepreneurship at such a young age. What is society doing man.

When they came over that day, she brought her water baby. It was in this bottle of water.

Alexandria: joanne! look at my water baby!

Emily(6 year old): see, so cute you know!

me: wth is this

Emily: water baby!

Alexandria: its alive

me: how can it be a living thing

Alexandria: it is!

me: I want to touch it

Emily: you cannot take it out of the water............... it will die

me: it's NOT ALIVE

Alexandria: it is! See, it's moving!

me: it is because the water is moving

.............................................................. HAHA they are so cute.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Thu, 28 Jun 2007 13:21:02 GMT

"EARTH!"
"FIRE!"
"WIND!"
"WATER!"
"HEART!"

"Go Planet!"

"By your powers combined, I am Captain Planet!"

Captain Planet, he's our hero
Gonna take pollution down to zero

He's our powers magnified
And he's fighting on the planet's side

Captain Planet, he's our hero
Gonna take pollution down to zero

Gonna help him put asunder
Bad guys who like to loot and plunder

"You'll pay for this Captain Planet!"

We're the Planeteers
You can be one too
'Cause saving our planet is the thing to do!

Looting and polluting is not the way
Hear what Captain Planet has to say!

"The Power is Yours!"

This song, is STUCK IN MY HEAD.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Wed, 13 Jun 2007 13:23:47 GMT

Maybe next time, when advertising, the actor/actress that plays a bigger role in

the movie should get his/her name bigger in

the posters.

Example:

OCEANS THIRTEEN

Starring

GEORGE

CLOONEY

BRAD PITT MATT DAMON etc

Becuase Matt Damon was small role in that show &I watched it because of him.